I’m young, defined
To some degree
By age and all
An eye can see,
But though my hair
Is not yet white
And steps are bouncy,
Soft and light,
I know the pain
Of burdened years,
The horror of
So many fears,
How daily tasks
Can change into
Grim obstacles
One must get through.

No matter where
I was around,
Some trouble always
Could be found.
My hands were hooks,
Like claws composed;
I would be stuck
If doors were closed,
No better than
A kitten’s paws
That could not even
Give applause.
Afraid to sit,
I could not rise,
Infirm and all
That it implies;
If something dropped
Onto the ground,
It felt as if
I had been drowned,
No way to pick
Things up for me,
Such was my life
Before, you see.

Pity followed
In people’s eyes,
How they would stare
Because I walked
And looked so young,
Seemed ordinary
Though I clung
To every rail
And every hope
I’d find a better
Way to cope
With illness that
Coursed through my frame,
I put the myth
Of age to shame.

48 thoughts on “Pre-mature

  1. I feel the effects of age, If we can only maintain our body like teens, I would not mind being 200 years old. (laughs)

    1. Haha, I suppose…healthy teens…after the hormones settle down that is.

  2. I like you certainly have a way with words the flow so rythmical

    1. Thank you Barb. You also have a beautiful flow to your words.

  3. This one made me cry! Seriously I felt so much emotion what a gift you have!

    1. Aww, no crying. I get emotional too when I am exhausted and sleep-deprived. Don’t work yourself too hard at your new job.

  4. Oh wow this effected me very deeply, one of your best poems so raw, heart-breaking, and honest. I read autoimmune diseases in the tags when I think that you are suffering its breaks my heart I wish you the best

    1. I am in full remission, knock on wood, so I am not currently suffering. I hope you will also achieve a state of complete remission for your seizures.

  5. Amazing poem. I’m still dealing with my feelings.

    1. You can always sweep them under the carpet or stick them in the closet. Not the best solution, but looks tidy.

  6. davidconfidential August 3, 2013 — 3:58 am

    Absolutely brilliant piece of writing. Top notch stuff.

    1. Why thank you very kindly. That is such a generous compliment.

  7. davidconfidential August 3, 2013 — 4:04 am

    Reblogged this on Dreaming with Icarus and commented:
    This an excellent piece of work from a very talented writer. A must read *****

  8. i work with people who have chronic illness and never have i seen it so eloquently and effectively articulated before. a powerful piece of writing.

    1. I often do not know if my words are being communicated effectively or not, so it means a lot to me when someone lets me know my writing makes sense to them. Your comment is very much appreciated. 🙂

  9. This is an excellent poem. I do homecare, and one of my clients has cerebral palsy, so I have seen a young woman trapped by her body, and do take this to heart. Whether by RA or any other infirmity, it’s sad to see “young” spirits inside uncooperative bodies. Sadder still are the clients I have that allow the victimization and let their spirits die.

    1. Yes, I agree that it is sadder when the spirit dies due to physical illness. People must find happiness wherever they can, despite the circumstances they may find themselves in.

  10. Very heartbraking, the honestu and rawness wrecks the readers mind and eyes as well.

    1. Ah, well, it was a rare piece of history about me that I generally don’t share with people.

  11. This is so visually beautiful. You chose such great words that allows the reader to empathise and with what it is like to have such an illness. I like ‘hands like hooks, like claws composed.’ Interesting that you also, ‘such was my life; before you see.’ If it is biographical, I am glad if it means its in the past or that you have found a better way to cope. Your poems really touch so many hearts.

    1. Yes, it is in the past, where I hope it remains (knock on wood). I feel truly blessed and grateful that my words can reach people. Thank you for your lovely comments. They are very much appreciated. 🙂

  12. I love how clear and raw this poem is! Great job=D

    1. Hehe thanks. Glad you liked it. 🙂

  13. Congratulations!!! I have nominated you for The Versatile Blogger Award. The link to your blog is tagged in my post! 🙂 Have a great day!

    1. Oh wow, thank you very much. I am honored by the consideration. 🙂

  14. OH So Beautiful!! I enjoyed this very much! 🙂 Thank you for sharing your talent and continuing to inspire me!

    1. I am so glad you enjoyed it. Thank you for reading and commenting. 🙂

  15. This is a most touching poem…I’m so happy (knock on wood) that you are in remission! I begin my own health problems, but my hair is grey, so it may not feel great, but it’s normal. Definitely chocolate day for you Cubby! 😉

    1. Health problems are never nice to deal with, but hopefully the ones you acquire will be easy to manage and will not significantly impact your quality of life.

      1. It will be what it will be…I’m just glad for you that you’re beating pre-maturity!

  16. So heartbreaking yet beautifully expressed. I’m so glad you are not currently suffering and hope that it remains behind you.

    1. I only wish the same for other people with debilitating conditions.

  17. inbetweenthemadness August 8, 2013 — 3:25 pm

    Beautifully moving and i hope everything is ok and doing well for you.

    1. Yes, everything seems to be ok. I still have trouble opening jars and doing up zippers, but I think I’ve always had those problems. 😉

      1. inbetweenthemadness August 8, 2013 — 4:35 pm

        lol well thats awesome…and women and jars dont always go together (thats the last thing you ladies need us men for!! haha)

  18. Thanks for letting me camp out in your blog for a little while today. I had a great time and tried to leave my campsite as good as when I arrived. I’ll be back!

    1. I see a few cat hairs lying around, but those could be mine. Glad you enjoyed your little camping trip. 🙂

  19. Such a raw and unfair situation! Why? So biographical as if it is you with hands like claws. This poem brought tears to my eyes dear Cubby, so much tears. I am so heart broken for the person behind the poetry. God has given you this talent to use words so beautifully and so honesty my friend. I have come to love you mt dear friend and that is a truth…

    1. This is in the past, where hopefully it will stay. It gave me insight into a different world I had never experienced before. Every situation and circumstance in life offers opportunities to learn and grow. I believe I am, if not better for it, perhaps a little wiser.

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