I met you by the cactus tree
As you were singing blissfully,
And it was just us two, you see,
On both sides of the cactus tree.
But it was very bristly
And always stood there guardedly.
There was no way to touch, you see,
Because there stood a cactus tree.
I tried to go around the tree,
And though I tried so hopefully,
I heard your voice but could not see
Your face beyond the cactus tree.
I longed to hold you close to me
Within my arms so tenderly,
But there was too much pain, you see,
From nettles of the cactus tree.
I know that I should let it be,
My logic tells me sensibly,
For now I know and now I see
The reason for the cactus tree.
But I will try to find the key
Because I love you earnestly,
And when I do I’ll set you free
To live beyond your cactus tree.
Absolutely love this one! As human beings we all have a cactus tree inside us which makes relationships difficult until we learn how to remove the…spikes? pins? Needles? …..what are they called? Anyway, great rhythm as always and super poem about love!
Cacti people can be hard to love as they to be very prickly, but I think given enough patience and love, they will let someone into their hearts and will love in return. š
i truly love how you write your poems. I felt this one, I’ve been this path before. Kind regards. =)
It is not easy to love while lugging a cactus tree around, but it sounds like you are past this now, and I am so glad for that…for Jim too. š
A very good story, the flow of the rhymes is masterfull and captivating š
Thank you for the kind words. I’m glad you enjoyed it. š
I like the story you’ve told…alas so many are hidden by prickly thornes. It seems to me that elements of the Ghazal have come to roost in this poem, could a this be a Cubby Ghazal quatrain variation?
Um, maybe a monorhyming Cubbified pseudo-Ghazal?
ROFLing! I love Cubbified pseudo-Ghazals! Do you think there may actually be a form similar to what you did here? Whatever…it’s great!
Beautifully written Cubby.. I love the metaphor of the cactus tree! You’re so creative with your writing š
Many thanks. Your words are always very encouraging and much appreciated. š
You’re most welcome Cubbimiester! š
Next time you should arrange to meet at the skinny smooth tree.
Those are much harder to find.
Brilliant! I have been there, too. It is a shame when the cactus tree keeps apart what should be together. Well done, as always.
It is a rather painful experience, for both parties, but it can be very rewarding if it works out in the end. I’m so glad you enjoyed it. š
It was patience all along, you see,
That helped defeat the cactus tree.
I pulled each pin out gingerly
So you and I could finally be.
I liked this apt analogy
About that nasty cactus tree,
We all have them; seems to me
It can often lead to tragedy.
Yes, indeed, you found the key,
You understand so well, I see,
That patient love can set one free,
So live and love accordingly.
š
Its a captivating piece from the start to the finish.
Glad you think so! š
Half nursery rhyme, half love story. Wholly poetry.
To be considered whole is all that my poetry ever asks for. š
Such a well written piece. I love the imagery and the whimsy. Nice work.
Thank you kindly. So glad you enjoyed it. š
That was great. Never give up and love conquers all. Beautifully said:)
Patience can work wonders when it comes to love. š
*appaluding!* Such a good message. ~ B
A bit of first-hand experience hehe. š
Hahaha. Bloody brilliant.
Hehe too kind. Glad you liked it! š
This reminds me of an old friend of mine. I told him he was prickly. š Great poem!
Hehe some are more visibly prickly than others. Glad you liked the poem! š
Very moving, Cubby! I love the cactus analogy.
I was itching to write a cactus poem, and it somehow took this shape. Glad you enjoyed it! š
Excellent!
Love, light and blessings
Many thanks! š
Love, love, love I think everything else has been said
Aw, so happy you enjoyed it. š
I love this š
That makes me very happy. š
This. Is beyond splendid. Something about this poem touched me deeply. Lovely work.
Aw, thank you so much for your kind words. It makes me happy to know my writing can reach others in some way. š
I really love this, it is so relatable for anyone and everyone.
Thank you kindly. I’m so glad you enjoyed it! š
Ouch, ouch
I love this
Yes, it can be a painful experience. So happy you enjoyed it. š
Really love this!! Bravo~
I am so delighted you do! š
Walls walls walls, the prison of the heart.
They need very little water to grow, cacti.
In night-cold and a summer they grow
Immutable.
Adapted to the bold extremes
Of blistery sun and frosty moon,
A cactus waits and hoards its love
That slumbers in a tough cocoon.
⤠I love your rhymes š They truly warm the heart.
magnificent rhyme, Cubby, loved it! Best wishes from Baldy š
You have some fantastic rhymes yourself Baldy. š
Brilliant work, so much feeling in the story line. Starting to feel human again hope to get to get my blog running properly today. Your poem made me smile.
I’m glad to see your blog up and running! Were any of those poems previously posted on your other blog? Some of them have a familiar ring, but I have a horrible memory so I’m not quite sure.
So cute, it reminds me of Kimya Dawson’s song “Tree Hugger”.
“The rattlesnake said I wish I had hands so I could hug you like a man and then the cactus said, ‘but don’t you understand? … My skin is covered with sharp spikes… Hug my flower with your eyes.'”
Hehe never heard the song before, but I will search for it and take a listen if I can. š
I love the story that you have told; very meaningful and beautiful š
I’m glad you think so! š
A beautiful and wise metaphor Cubby!
Some are more pricklier than others. š
Reblogged this on On the light side of gamification and commented:
Hey there,
you’re a real poet!
Thank you so much for sharing decided to reblog it, hope you don’t mind š
Have a great day,
Chris
I don’t mind the reblog at all. I’m flattered you would consider it reblog worthy. š
Thank you, it was absolutely worthy š how are you?
My favorite of all your wonderful poems that I have read this morning… Thanks!
I’m so glad you found a favorite in my cactus poem this morning. š
Such true-to-life words — very few of us have not been pricked by the cactus tree at one time or another. And some of us do the pricking.
We live in a prickly world. š
Isn’t a cactus classified as a succulent? Prickly on the outside, full of moisture and softness on the inside. I think. Beautifully done.x
Yes, they are indeed classified as succulent. They remind me a little of crabs. Tough shell, soft exterior. Crabs and pricks would make an interesting combination, no? š
I’ll watch this space then. š x
I’ll watch this space then. š x
A truly magnificent poem.
Well thank you very kindly! š
Worth the pain š
Haha yes, I think so. š
It’s like some kind of metaphor for something, isn’t it?
Um, I think it would describe you really well, in fact. But extra, extra prickly. š