Losing Sense of Self (Villanelle)

I see the worries in your eyes;
In lines above I see the fear.
One day I hope you’ll realize

You carry demons in disguise
Who blur the self to seem unclear.
I see the worries in your eyes

And how you always agonize
On image, ways you may appear.
One day I hope you’ll realize

Vile tongues that always criticize
Speak shallow words, ring insincere.
I see the worries in your eyes,

Your willingness to compromise
Identity and disappear.
One day I hope you’ll realize

You’ve lost your sense of self to lies,
A shame since you’re its engineer.
I see the worries in your eyes;
One day I hope you’ll realize.

2019 Β© Sonya Annita Song

Want to learn how to write a villanelle?Β  Click here for the villanelle challenge and give it a try! πŸ™‚

62 thoughts on “Losing Sense of Self (Villanelle)

  1. archangelwhitewolf's avatar
    Archangel White Wolf January 21, 2019 — 8:45 am

    🐺🌹❀️

  2. Shantanu Baruah's avatar

    Damn beautiful and you know so many forms of poetry. I am in awe with your talent

    1. Cubby's avatar

      You have the content, regardless of form, and that is what matters most. πŸ™‚

      1. Shantanu Baruah's avatar

        You are so very kind and sweet 😊🌸❀️

          1. Shantanu Baruah's avatar

            😊❀️❀️

  3. Violet Lentz's avatar

    Excellent write, and such a good point across with a villanelle that’s not easy to do..

    1. Cubby's avatar

      That’s very kind of you. I almost lost myself while writing it. πŸ˜‰

  4. Mary Herbert's avatar

    So good. I love this one.

    1. Cubby's avatar

      I’m so glad you enjoyed this one. πŸ™‚

    1. Cubby's avatar

      You are too kind. Thank you. πŸ™‚

      1. flintsaunders's avatar

        You are most welcome, all the best. πŸ™‚

  5. anaistra's avatar

    Brilliant!

    1. Cubby's avatar

      You are too kind. Thank you. πŸ™‚

  6. adiscardedplant's avatar

    This is an excellent write!! Also, thank you so much for sharing your experiments with us, your audience. πŸ™‚

    1. Cubby's avatar

      My experiments sometimes blow up in my face, so hopefully you’ll be safe from where you are! πŸ˜‰

  7. Jen's avatar

    You definetly have a way with words. Well put πŸ™‚πŸŒΌ

    1. Cubby's avatar

      Better than my actual speech, which can be borderline incoherent at times. πŸ™‚

      1. Jen's avatar

        Well, We hear you heart and your heart speaks volumes! ❀🌺

  8. Michael Nganga's avatar

    Shaken
    Braethtaken
    Great flow
    Couldn’t blink my brow

    1. Cubby's avatar

      Thank you, Michael. Love your impromptu rhymes. πŸ™‚

  9. Wordcipher's avatar

    I may try it out. Funny thing is, sometimes these challenges just make us learn how to write with new styles but we still need our bag of ideas to bbe full to the brim each time we try achieve something beautiful

    1. Cubby's avatar

      Absolutely agree. Well said! πŸ™‚

  10. soberflight's avatar

    So easy to be caught up in others’ opinions. It’s even worse if you never had a chance to discover who you are to start with. Good writing.

    1. Cubby's avatar

      It sounds like you have a very good understanding of this. πŸ™‚

  11. Eyes of prophetess's avatar

    Really good poem. So much depth and realism. Losing sense of self so easy to lose, so hard to find again. It’s sad that many of us allow others to shame us, knowingly or not, into hiding our true selves to the point of sometimes losing who we are altogether…for better or worse… 😏

    1. Cubby's avatar

      What an eloquent comment. Thank you so much for your beautiful words. πŸ™‚

      1. Eyes of prophetess's avatar

        Ur very welcome. I look forward to reading much more of ur work. πŸ’•

  12. magnifyingLassblog's avatar

    Very nice. I love the villanelle. So glad you are perpetuating it!

    1. Cubby's avatar

      I’m trying to perpetuate! I’m trying. πŸ™‚

  13. Clayton from tales2apoint's avatar

    You’re writing again! Thanks for liking my post.

    1. Cubby's avatar

      I saw a familiar shadowy face and thought I would amble over to get a better look. We’re both 5 years older, but you don’t look like you’ve aged a bit. Glad to see you again! πŸ™‚

  14. Nobbinmaug's avatar

    Damn! That’s all I have to say about that.

    Another challenge? You are very challenging. I like that.

    1. Cubby's avatar

      I try to do a challenge once a week. I am planning another one tomorrow…I think.

      1. Nobbinmaug's avatar

        I’m planning on catching up on my blog stuff today. I’m down to 31 emails. Most of that is blog stuff. I don’t think I’m going to catch up on challenges, though. I’ll get to them, though.

        1. Cubby's avatar

          No rush. They’re not going anywhere. πŸ™‚

  15. lonelyheart's avatar

    This is an amazing piece. My heart literally stopped as I kept reading. The burning meaning behind this poem is simply simple in its own perfect way.
    ‘You’ve lost your sense of self to lies,
    A shame since you’re its engineer.’
    Beautiful. Just beautiful

    1. Cubby's avatar

      You sense the meaning deeply, and I thank you for that, along with your lovely words. πŸ™‚

  16. KT's avatar

    We need more self-accountable, self-actualizing human engineers. Great work. Beautiful words!

    1. Cubby's avatar

      I agree about the need for more of those types of engineers. Thank you. πŸ™‚

  17. Tournesol's avatar

    Bravo!! I always feel inspired to try a new form when I read your poety, Sonya. This is what I have been missing all these years. When I am finished my English assignments, I want to give it a try…this particular form sings to me. Beautifully written and profound words xx

    1. Cubby's avatar

      Ooo, I think the villanelle would be a good fit for your writing style! Now I can’t wait to read your villanelle! πŸ™‚

  18. mnts1955's avatar
    naked poetry / naked poet January 24, 2019 — 4:45 am

    Bravo!!!

  19. Unknown's avatar

    Very nicely written. I love the flow and the thought.

    1. Cubby's avatar

      That’s very kind of you. Thank you so much. πŸ™‚

  20. janesig's avatar

    I love the rhythm and melodic feel to the villanelle form. Though I’m not up for the challenge just now, I’ve an old one I wrote many years ago thst I might post sometime.

    1. Cubby's avatar

      I would love to read your villanelle! I find you really have to be in the mood to write one or it’s like pulling teeth. πŸ™‚

      1. janesig's avatar

        I’ve just posted it over on my blog.

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